Sometimes I feel like I've messed up too many times to try again. I feel like Christ wouldn't want me to follow Him because I'm not clean. But the more I learn about my Savior the more I see that those things just aren't true. I'm not too far gone. Christ wants me to follow Him because through Him I can be made clean! One verse that really hit me while I was reading was 2 Nephi 12:5, "O house of Jacob, come ye and let us walk in the light of the Lord; yea, come, for ye have all gone astray, every one to his wicked ways." I like that we are all called to follow Christ and we don't have to be perfect to do it. He knows we each have our struggles with sin, we each have our "wicked ways," and still He invites us to follow Him. Only in Him can those sins be taken away.
I love the verses that talk about the envy of Ephraim being taken away. 2 Nephi 21:12-13 in this case. Jealousy has been a constant struggle in my life. I know Christ can and IS helping me with it, but I stumble a lot. I love to know that someday the envy will be gone. I have seen Him help me recognize when I am letting envy creep into my mind. I feel His love when I ask Him to help me take it away. It has been a process and I'm still learning, but it is really wonderful. I love being able to see someone else's successes and happiness and feel joy for them. Instead of envy poisoning how I see someone I start to see them how Christ would and that is an incredible blessing. Why would I ever hold onto my jealousy when I know the blessings that come from giving it to God? Yet sometimes I do. But He never fails to remind me what I really want. And that is to follow Him.
In the last days and forever, I want to be on the Lord's side. I know I need to be purified and cleansed from my wicked ways, but I WANT to be the Lord's. I feel like that's a step in the right direction.
These chapters told us that God will destroy the wickedness of the world as He did with Assyria. He will destroy their idols. So, what do we worship? Do we have any idols before God? We can't play for both teams, "no man can serve two masters,"(Matthew 6:24). We may not bow down in front of a golden calf or a shrine of graven images, but putting anything before the Lord is creating an idol and a false god. We all need to look inside ourselves and check where our hearts are. Do we love God with all our hearts, souls and minds? (Matthew 22:37). He has to come first. Only then will everything else fall into place.
We know who is going to win in the end. In the battle between good and evil, God has already won and good has triumphed. The trick is, we need to know what side we're on.
Day 8: 2 Nephi 25-33
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